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back to regularly scheduled programming

Apparently I took a 13 day blogging break.

I didn’t mean to take a break, it just happened. I can barely even remember what happened between last time I blogged and now. I do remember that I sat Annabelle down on the edge of the front porch to take her picture and she fell over backwards into the bushes. Yesterday she got half a plastic Easter egg stuck in her mouth. Look for my book on child safety coming out next month.

Joanna, one of my best friends from home, has been visiting for the week. We went to Walmart and the splash pad so I’m sure all her dreams of a wild and fun Nashville vacation were fulfilled. She keeps saying she doesn’t mind hanging out at home or doing Annabelle things but I still feel bad it’s not more exciting. I scheduled AB to go to daycare today so we could spend some time alone but poor Joanna got the stomach bug and spent all day in bed. I wasn’t going to cancel daycare at the last minute so after I dropped Annabelle off I went to the car place to vacuum out my car. All was going well until I accidently started vacuuming up my shirt and couldn’t get it to stop. My shirt got lifted so high I’m sure the bottom of my bra was showing. Speaking of awkward moments. At church on Sunday I was wearing my new wedges and I lost my footing and fell over. You can just call me Grace. Naturally I didn’t fall over in an empty room. I fell over in front of a crowd. I didn’t know what to say to I blurted out “Sorry! I’m so sorry!” WHAT WAS I SORRY FOR? That they had to witness what appeared to be a drunken mother leaving the nursery? I might need to find a new church.

Since we’re already all over the place here I might as well discuss daycare. After much anguish and tears I decided to send AB to daycare a few hours a week while I go to appointments, do errands, paint my nails and sit around eating bonbons. A lady the next street over runs a little home daycare and since available babysitters are few and far between around here, I signed her up. Last week was her first time going and I almost threw up in the bushes outside the lady’s door, I was so nervous. You may be thinking I’m a helicopter parent who doesn’t let her child out of sight. You would be wrong. I’ve hired babysitters and left her plenty of times but I never dropped her off with someone I don’t know. I’ve seen the news. I know what can happen. That’s why I picked a place close to my house. I can practically see it from my back deck so if there’s a fire I can be there before the first responders. I wish I was kidding.

In other news, we celebrated Father’s Day. I ordered Christopher’s gift late so it didn’t arrive in time for him to open Sunday but he got no less than 7 cards to make up for the lack of wrapping paper. He stayed home with Annabelle while Joanna and I went out to paint pottery. It was his special day so it seemed only fair he should have the privilege of changing the many diapers of his favorite offspring while the one who brought her into this world relaxed.

there is no title that would accurately describe the randomness contained here

The other day Annabelle and I went to pick up a few things at Publix. The following conversation took place between me and the boy bagging the groceries:
Him: Do you want me to push the carriage* out to the car for you?
Me:  No thank you, I’m fine. (I’m all for boys being gentlemen but I didn’t have any spare cash for a tip.)
Him: Are you sure? I don’t mind.

Me: Oh, we’re good.
Him: It’s not a problem.
Me: I can do it but thank you anyway.

I then proceeded to crash the carriage straight into the neighboring cash register and almost run over people entering through the exit door. Just call me Grace. 


* Carriage/cart/buggy. Toemayto, toemato.


To add to the awkward experiences I’ve lived through lately, when the pastor at church said to me “I’ll tell Chris too”, I stared at him for 48 minutes trying to figure out who this Chris person was. Don’t mind me. I’m just the person who doesn’t recognize her husband’s name when she hears it.



So that’s been life around here. In other words, it’s business as usual.

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I am so excited about Annabelle’s first 4th of July. Fourth of July is right up there with Christmas when it comes to my favorite holidays. We made an American flag with her footprint. Feel free to send us a Pinterest Parents of the Year Award.  

To round out this hodge podge post, and because I’m procrastinating about cleaning the bathroom, I present the following photo. This is the face of someone who slept from 9:30pm-6:30am, partied for an hour then went back to sleep until 10:30.
This is how I felt about Sesame’s sleep accomplishments:
HAPPY DANCE! HAPPY DANCE! HAPPY DANCE!