In what is becoming a yearly tradition, Annabelle and I started our annual travel circuit this weekend. Much like birds traveling south for the winter, we travel to Massachusetts in the spring. 


I’m pleased to report we did not have to turn around once. I saw a Massachusetts license plate and stupidly thought “I should follow that person since we’re both going to the same place.” Because that makes sense. There are 50,000 places they could be going and I guarantee you not one is where I wanted to end up. It’s remarkable I’m allowed on the road. 


While AB listened to Frog and Toad, I rotated through my arsenal of audiobooks and podcasts. I was looking for a particular podcast when I found a random one hosted by Patience and Mel. They had strong accents and I spent considerable time figuring it 1) where they were from and 2) who they were. I correctly guessed they were Australian for which I patted myself on the back. Christopher is always saying I’m bad at accents so it was a personal victory. They were talking about their trip to an event called Splenda where they both used “bum bags.” It eventually became clear that Splenda was not a celebration of fake sugar, but an Australian music festival called Splendour on the Grass. I found the term “bum bags” disturbing. Who boasts about something like using a bum bag? Turns out it was a fanny pack, which I guess is also an odd name when you think about it.


The ride was going quite smoothly with Patience and Mel when I had to veer off the road to avoid running over a dead BEAR CUB on the road. The only time I’ve seen a bear is at a zoo and all the sudden there was a dead one in front of me. Things are weird out on the road.


I do a lot of veering on these lengthy trips. One of these days I’ll be pulled over for suspected drunk driving and I’ll have to convince the policeman that I’d not drunk and/or high, just trying to give my daughter her Frozen graham crackers or turn off the darn musical turtle. It was juuust out of reach and for two hours I heard it singing on repeat.
“My friends are traveling on my back,
I’m taking them for a ride.
They like to spin ’round and ’round
as we go along.” 


Maybe Splendour on the Grass is looking for an addition to their 2018 lineup. I know a musical turtle who is going to be kicked out of my car soon.