Aug 20, 2016 | Uncategorized, What's going on |
We’re currently in the middle of Nap Strike 2016.
Not that I’m counting, but Sesame has only taken two naps in the last twelve days. I keep putting her down as I have for the last 30 months of her life but she won’t sleep. She’ll talk, sing, play and eventually whine and cry but not sleep. It’s been taking her more than an hour to fall asleep at night. She’s figured out my life doesn’t stop when she’s asleep and has developed a bad case of FOMO. She’s also getting molars which always bothers her so I know her little system is all messed up. Even so, doesn’t she know I need her to keep taking naps for the next 3 years?! I can’t rest during the day when she’s not sleeping because as soon as I lay down she starts yelling, ”Mama! I waked up! I waked up, mama!” NO YOU DIDN’T YOU NEVER WENT TO SLEEP. Between her not sleeping and my insomnia kicking in I’ve aged 60 years in the last two weeks.
Our friend from Bible study had a baby in June and we finally went over to see her. I was on track to leave the house on time but the muffins exploded, the shelf fell off the wall and Annabelle took the stuffing we used to a make a craft and spread it all over the living room. Just another 10 minutes in paradise.
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Sarah: I get to hold a baby!
Maddie: Where’s my mom?
Annabelle: I refuse to look at my mother holding another child. |
Speaking of babies, Annabelle is very into them right now. She’s big into talking about how she used to live in my belly and what kind of crib she slept in while in Hotel Womb. She’s always talking about her “yittle sister Kaferine” and telling me I’m “going to have a baby tomorrow.” Between the two of us she’s the only one interested in having a baby tomorrow.
For todays edition of trying to tire AB out for a nap we went to the zoo. I thought the weather was beautiful when we left the house. Thirty seven minutes later we were watching the elephants with sweat dripping down our backs. The zoo was approximately as hot as the surface of the sun. Of all the animals to be seen Annabelle likes the polar bear statue best. Every time she seems it she says, “so cuuute! I wuv da mama and da baby! Es so cuuute!” and I have to act like I’m seeing it for the first time.
We sat down to eat lunch near a group of Amish. If there’s any people group I like to think I’m an expert on it’s the Amish. I tried not to stare too much but seeing them made me so happy. One of the ladies was trying to get something from the vending machine but it wasn’t working. Eventually two more women, a men and a little boy went over to help. I’d have offered my assistance but vending machines tend to eat my money and not give me anything in return. Besides, I was wearing shorts so I didn’t want to draw attention to myself. By their standards I was basically dressed like a prostitute.
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| We found a life size Farmer Brian from her Little People farm. |
Our three hours on the surface of the sun didn’t make her tired enough. She was in bed for two hours and started yelling that she wanted underwear. I went up to check and she was standing there buck naked. I guess she knows how to take her diaper off. Happy Friday!
Aug 11, 2016 | Uncategorized, What's going on |
It’s been typical summer activities around here. Swimming, praying for the air conditioning to work, drinking from the house and all that.
Mom came to visit last week. She watched Annabelle while I set up my craft room and unpacked boxes that should have been unpacked 11 months ago. Whenever we have someone visit we beg give them the opportunity to babysit AB so we can go out. She’s a talking, eating, walking four hour souvenir we love to hand out. We went out to eat at an Asian restaurant then to a paint night. Having just done a paint night with Joanna I felt very prepared and was possibly sitting on a high horse.
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Taken shortly after my shoe broke apart while I was trying to paint a masterpiece.
It’s a real shame since I LOVED those shoes. |
Christopher took the B part of BYOB seriously.
It must have worked because look at his masterpiece on the right. Not a stroke out of place. He was the only male among 30+ females and got the most compliments. It looked like I used my hands as a pallet but he didn’t have any paint on him. You can’t really tell from this angle but I painted the weirdest looking grass. It looks like those ornamental glass balls people put in their gardens.
On Saturday we went blueberry picking. Some people picked berries off the bush, some stole them out of the bucket.
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| Pigtails mean double the opportunity for bows. |
“Hi, yittle sweetheart. You so cute!”
In Olympic viewing news, it’s not going well. The first two nights the antenna we just bought refused to work. The third night I got it to work if I squeezed the metal part a certain amount. It wasn’t the most comfortable situation but at this point I can’t be too picky. I saw a bunch of swimming which means I saw Michael Phelps flapping his arms around. Yawn. Last night I was so excited about finally seeing gymnastics that I accidentally broke the antenna. I snapped it right in two.
Also.
Jul 30, 2016 | Currently, Uncategorized, What's going on |
Reading: A Different Beautiful by Courtney Westlake. It’s the true story of a family whose daughter was born with a major skin condition and their journey through it. Confession: I signed up to be on the launch team for the book. I felt so professional! Pin a rose on my nose and call me an editor. Then I forgot to read the book for the month because of potty training. But I’m back on track now since potty training is a no-go.
Giddy Up, Eunice by Sophie Hudson. I’ve read Sophie’s blog for years now and I’m the proud owner of all her books. They’ve all been good but this is by far the best. Get yourself to the bookstore and buy it now!
Columbine by Dave Cullen. For reasons I can’t explain I’ve been into reading books about national tragedies. I cannot put this book down. It’s not a summer beach read but it’s memorizing.
Dreaming about: my childhood crush. I dreampt I was stuck at home during a snowstorm and a van load of friends came to rescue me. I sat down in the only available seat which happened to be next to the love of my young life, Bernie. He put his arm around me and said, “I love you but you already know that.” Thirteen year old Sarah waited her entire childhood to hear him say that.
Buying: Dixie cups. I didn’t realize until Thursday that the supplies for AB’s parents day out program needed to be at the school on Wednesday. I thought I had until September when she starts. I made a mad dash to the dollar store and got everything except the Dixie cups. The list specifically said “ONLY 5oz cups” and the dollar store only had 9oz. Rite Aid had 3oz. I finally found them at a third store when I was just about to throw in the towel. The rule follower in me would have had a conniption if I brought in the wrong size.
In related PDO news, apparently I don’t know the year my only child was born in. The doctor had to correct me. I’m already rocking this school stuff!
Freezing: Popsicles. We made them before lunch and Annabelle asked no less than 8 times in two minutes if they were done yet. There will be tears if they’re not done when she gets up from her nap!
Baking: The Pioneer Woman’s strawberry oatmeal bars. They are delicious and I want to eat the entire 9×12 pan. I told Christopher they’re healthy because they have oats and fruit (in the jelly form). He said “You put a whole bowl of brown sugar and a whole bowl of butter in there. It’s not healthy.” Whatever. It has fruit so I’m still saying it’s healthy. He has a terrible addiction to coke which he claims isn’t bad for him “because it’s diet coke” so I don’t think he’s a reputable source on what is or is not healthy.
Watching: Reruns of Minnie Mouse Bowtique. The only movie we’ve watched lately was Spotlight, the story of the Catholic church scandal. It wasn’t a happy movie but it was very well done. See above where I mention tragedies. None of our shows are on so we’re in a dry spell. I’m sure there’s a direct connection between no shows and the impressive number of books I’ve gotten through lately.
Ok, fine. I’ve been watching The Bachelorette too. You know I have. It’s like a sickness for which there is no cure.
Recovering from: our big outing this morning. Normally we only do one exciting outing a day*. If we’re being really ambitious we might do two. AB is perfectly fine with this low key life as she doesn’t know anything different. Keeping expectations low since 2014! Today we went to an outdoor music class followed by the splash pad and the playground. Everything was in the same park so it wasn’t hard to jump from one place to the other. We spent enough time splashing and swinging to ensure a good nap. All heck broke loose on the way house. She started crying because “THE WINDOW FELL ON MEEEEE! THE WINDOW FELLLLLL!” All that happened was she was playing with the screen and it brushed her arm. Drama City over here. The teen years will be so fun!
* If we’re being honest somedays we don’t leave the house.
Jul 12, 2016 | Sesame, Uncategorized, What's going on |
Let me tell you about my day.
First of all, my bra wouldn’t stop squeaking. I know. I didn’t think bras made noises either. It was a new bra and I guess it had to be broken in. Every time I’d move I’d have a soundtrack from under my shirt. It was very attractive.
Second, I had to be at the doctors at 8:30. I don’t know why I made an appointment for so early. I remember making the appointment and agreeing to the time but not really thinking it through until after I hung up.
Third, the doctor performed the test that every woman dreads. From under the sheet I heard her say, “You really don’t like this, do you?” DOES ANYONE? DOES ANYONE LIKE THIS?
And finally, I signed Annabelle up for school. Technically it’s a parents day out program and not a real school, but it’s in a preschool and AB thinks it’s real school. To send or not to send her, that was the question. I debated about it long and hard with myself and Christopher (and my poor friends who were the recipients of 15 million texts on the topic). I firmly think she’s too young for school but this is basically a glorified play date and we could both use some time away from each other. I don’t have a babysitter here yet so we spend all the minutes/24/7/365 together. I need a consistent break for my mental health and sanity.
I got emotional when the teacher was giving us a tour. I worked in a preschool for 6 years. I’ve always been the one to care for the kids but now I’m the one leaving my child. What if she needs me??? Today it’s PDO, tomorrow she’ll be graduating college. Sunrise, sunset and all that.
Then I thought about three hours all to myself every week and the mood really brightened.
Not to over exaggerate, but freedom makes me feel like this:
I just received this email from Miss Trish the principle.
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| Yes! Let’s give two year olds a bunch of sharpies! |
She needs to bring supplies? Isn’t the check I gave them enough?
Jun 19, 2016 | Uncategorized, What's going on |
I haven’t blogged as much lately because I’ve been busy running.
No one is more shocked by this highly unusual turn of events than I am.
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| I’m with Amy. Vertical running is too much work. |
I don’t like running. The farthest I ran all fall and winter was from the car to the front door. Part of me thinks it would be nice to run 12 miles without a care in the world, but the second I start running I feel like I’m dying and I begin planning what my funeral program should look like. Christopher mentioned he was going to do the Couch to 5K program and my head told me not to say anything, but my mouth said, “I’ll do it with you!”
As life would have it, I am the only one who has been sticking to the program with any regularity. Just because he isn’t as faithful doesn’t mean I’m going to quit. In fact, 85% of the reason I’m continuing is just so I can beat him. He’s very uncompetitive but I’m the middle of five kids. I learned how to compete for what I wanted. Most of our conversations about competition go something like this:
Me: Want to play a game?
Christopher: Sure.
Me: Which one? I’ll beat you at any.
Christopher: You probably will.
It’s not as fun when your opponent doesn’t care.
All the sweat must have gone to my brain because on Wednesday I found myself in an office with a personal trainer named Sue measuring my hips and bust. Again, HIGHLY UNUSUAL ACTIVITY for someone who enjoys drinking ice coffee while laying on the couch and moving as little as possible. Sue showed me around the cardio area and asked how often I want to come in for my new workout regime. “Maybe three times a week? Four?” I shut that down real fast. I’m impressed with people who work out hours each day, but I’m not one of them. I enjoy an hour or two of zumba and I suffer through half hour runs. I have about an hour beyond that I’m looking to fill with new exercises.
I don’t want to spend 240 minutes a week on a machine that looks like this.
Besides, we have to park down the hill from the Y and thanks to Annabelle’s ancient snail pace of a walk and her insistence in touching every single link in the chain along the way, it takes us 10 minutes to make it to the building. That walk alone earns me my daily chocolate. I have to replenish those lost calories somehow.
Jun 11, 2016 | Uncategorized, What's going on |
It’s business as usual over here, except I’ve added skunk patrol to my list of daily activities.
That’s right. Skunk patrol.
Earlier in the week the landlord’s father was over doing his usual puttering around. He started talking to the neighbors who told him there’s a skunk living under our shed. Apparently they’ve seen it multiple times. I haven’t seen or smelled a skunk since we arrived, but it makes sense to take the word of hippies who have been known to smoke things that give the neighborhood a unique fragrance over the word of someone who is completely clearheaded. The landlord’s father put a trap behind the shed and asked me to check it daily and report back my findings. Annabelle likes to get in on the action but I try to keep her far away to avoid this type of situation:
I have plenty of time to check the trap in between hand washing all our dishes. Our dishwasher started it’s slow death around the time we returned from Texas. (Isn’t this RIVETING?) I never think about all the dishes when I talk about going back to a time when life was more simple and we didn’t rely on machines so much. We finally got our new dishwasher on Wednesday. It was the Big Event of our day. I almost wanted to break a bottle of champagne and christen the dishwasher before it’s first use. My joy only lasted so long. It isn’t draining so a repair man and the landlord will be over shortly to look things over. Looks like I’ll be giving the landlord my daily skunk report in person.
(Side note about the landlord and his father- they’re both named Jim and they both love Annabelle. The older Mr. Jim comes over so often he is familiar with Annabelle’s nap schedule. If he comes by at 1:30 and she’s still up he’ll ask why she’s not sleeping yet. If he comes by around 3:30 he pokes his head around the house looking for her. I might hire him as a babysitter. One of my main requirement for childcare is someone who understands naps.)
Meanwhile, things have been pretty stressful in Annabelle’s world. It really would have pushed her over the edge if I gave her a popsicle.
