Wife, mother, laugh-er at very inopportune moments, and matchmaker. I am an excessive user of commas and exclamation marks. I once won March Madness despite knowing nothing about basketball, and I know how to find all the best Dunkin Donuts coupons. Clearly my talents are just endless.
let’s back ourselves up to before Christmas
I’ve just returned from bringing Lucielle to the vet. I’ve been concerned about what looks like a lump on each side of her stomach. Naturally I diagnosed her with cancer, and ran through all scenarios of surgery and eventual early death, leaving Linus all alone. Turns out, it’s nothing more than sister cat is packing on the pounds and, like her mother, she holds her weight in her stomach. To add insult to injury, she was diagnosed with asthma and got a steroid shot in said fat. She’s now refusing to look at me. I don’t blame her. Who wants to deal with this so early in the new year?
***
Because December is not busy enough, the powers that be at school decided we needed to fit in a Christmas Around the World extravaganza. I enjoy all these events- World Day, Faces of History, science fair (to an extent), etc. I just wish they didn’t happen three days before Christmas break when we all have seven thousand other things to accomplish.
No one was surprised to hear that AB’s teacher was overwhelmed as well. So what did I do? I offered my services even though I had moaned 50 million times that we had TOO MUCH HAPPENING IN DECEMBER AND WE NEED TO STOP COMMITTING. That’s how I found myself hand cutting a paper Christmas lights banner and taping it to fairy lights so it glowed. I did accidently tape the word backward. Ailartsua wasn’t studied by anyone, but it was an accurate representation of my brain. 
I also put together two palm trees with questionable lighting. I didn’t choose the placement of the trees and food table, but I liked it by the flag. ‘Merica! 
This photo is another award-winning treasure for AB’s childhood memory book. She is but a blur. You can’t even tell it’s her, carrying a candle during Silent Night. The children had been told time and time again to sing loudly as they walked into the sanctuary. Only the solitary voice of her teacher could be heard, singing about a silent and holy night. Miss Amanda carried the entire performance of eighty children. I didn’t offer to help with the singing. The way things were going, I would have sung Tnelis Thgin next to my Ailartsua banner.
TLDs
I have a phrase I like to use when things go wrong- TLDs. Technical Life Difficulties. It's used when the store is out of whole milk, you forget to pick up a prescription, or you miss an important phone call. I present a list of TLDs from the last two weeks. - The...
In Never Neverland
Another show is in the books. I was allowed a brief selfie when dropping AB off before the first show. "Mom!! I have to go!! Cora is going in before me!! I neeeeeed to gooooo!!!!" The wheel on Hook's ship was Christopher's when he was a little boy. It's been hanging...
Bham
We spent the first part of spring break at appointments, weeding the yard, and bopping about town. We spent the tail end partying it up on Miami beaches with the cool kids. Just kidding. They'd never let Christopher and his old man bones within 50 miles of spring...
.ten.
When AB was born, I made the goal of taking her picture at the exact time she was born every year until she turned ten. Ideally I'll do it for the next 50 years, but I'm trying to be realistic. I don't achieve many of my big goals, but I achieved this one. Every year,...
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