Wife, mother, laugh-er at very inopportune moments, and matchmaker. I am an excessive user of commas and exclamation marks. I once won March Madness despite knowing nothing about basketball, and I know how to find all the best Dunkin Donuts coupons. Clearly my talents are just endless.

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maybe don’t ask us for medical or religious advice

I had yet another internal ultrasound yesterday because it’s what I do on days ending in Y. I’ve seen the inside of my uterus more times in the last year than I saw some family members. I considered asking for a printed photo to include in my Christmas card this year. “Here’s Annabelle learning to rollerblade. Here are Linus and Lucy being lazy bums. Here’s Sarah’s uterus. If you look closely, you might see an ovary.” Everyone would hang it on their refrigerator. I also had 12 tubes of blood drawn for the fertility doctor. I thought for sure I’d need a blood transfusion by the time she was done.

We’ve made it the entire week so far without going to Annabelle’s doctor. Sure, it’s only Tuesday but last week we were there twice in 72 hours because evidently we love copays. She was diagnosed with swollen glands again. We cannot get a handle on those glands of hers. I asked the doctor to show me how to check the glands myself and he did, but I can’t tell a thing. Isn’t the ability to check glands and throats for infection something they should hand out at the hospital when the baby is born? They sent us out with a blanket and mesh underwear but I would have appreciated an honorary medical degree as well.

AB has many talents but she’s struggling with spelling and phonics. It’s an uphill battle. This has not stopped her from writing out sheets and sheets of notes and letters. She wrote this essay last week.

We must worship God every day. Every fifth day we must prepare a pot of water and dance on it.

Her religious practices are questionable but her heart is in the right place.

Minnie Mouse sure knows how to party

Minnie Mouse sure knows how to party

I'm not sure if you're aware, but September 28th is Minnie Mouse's birthday. I wasn't aware until recently. AB is OBSESSED with birthday parties and had been asking to have a MM party for her "two year birfday." I didn't want to start a pattern of giving her a party...

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in which Sesame agrees to be interviewed

in which Sesame agrees to be interviewed

I conducted this interview yesterday during supper because I firmly believed yesterday was the 28th, the day Sesame Pie officially turned 2.5. Come to find out it was the 27th. I never write the date any more. I barely know what day of the week it is yet I'm...

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none of this is necessary information

subtitled- more never-ending documentation of my health issues After the success of MDO on Tuesday I spent some time considering how we'd spend the rest of the week. It's hard to top the excitement of riding a plastic car around the playground but...

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Sesame goes to school- 2016

Sesame goes to school- 2016

The long awaited day in Annabelle's life finally happened. She officially goes "to school". A school that is all of three hours a week and serves goldfish and apple juice. I'm not a school person but I'd sign up for that experience. We made a big deal out of today...

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