Update 1- My life of high crime is quickly escalating. When we were at Jimmy Carter’s boyhood home last weekend, I picked a few weeds and made a little bouquet. Christopher showed us how to get nectar from a honeysuckle plant. It was all very innocent until Kevin the tour guide rode over in his motorized scooter to say picking flowers on national historic sites is a federal violation. I dropped my bouquet behind my back so he wouldn’t see how much I picked and fine me per weed.


This morning I went to Fred’s Super Dollar store to return an air pump. As an aside, Fred’s Super Dollar is not an accurate name. If I see “dollar store” on a sign I expect everything in the store to be a dollar. Don’t be throwing “dollar store” around when you’re selling a pack of socks for $7.50. That’s false advertising and technically every store is a dollar store. I told the cashier the pump wasn’t inflating our new pool and gave her the receipt. I didn’t know the receipt was from a different trip to the fake dollar store and didn’t have the pump on it. She said I could return it without the receipt for store credit. She kept trying to beep the box but the register wasn’t accepting it. Low and behold I was trying to return the air pump I got at Walmart and not the one from Fred’s. She gave me a look that said she was on to me with my wrong receipt and product from a different store. I slunk out like someone tangled up in a money laundering deal gone awry.



Update 2- The mouse situation. Last week Rick the exterminator came by to spray the house for cockroaches. His boss, Don, came by on Wednesday to inspect the house. I told him about the mouse in my bed and he said, “Oh, it was probably a little ol’ field mouse. They’re smaller than regular mice and you’ll see them all around. It wasn’t a regular mouse.” I DON’T CARE WHAT TYPE OF MOUSE IT WAS. Just give me all the traps and get them out of my house. I asked if he has a spray for frogs.
 I’ve been asking that same question for 15 months now and never gotten a good answer but I’ll keep trying. He said, “Little tree frogs don’t do any damage. They’re really great ’cause they keep the bugs away.” They don’t do that great a job since we had to hire Don to get the bugs out.
I have made it a goal to create a frog repellent before we leave the state of Georgia. It will be the legacy I leave behind. If doctors can perform face transplants I don’t understand why no one can keep frogs out of my house. 


Update 3- Apparently I’ve become invested in superhero movies. I didn’t think I was a superhero person. I watched Spider Man growing up but never cared about the Hulk or Batman or anyone else. 
Since getting married I’ve seen several superhero movies. I’ve rolled my eyes through many a scene and explanation of Marvel vs. DC Comics blahblahblah. I don’t understand their different worlds or languages and the need for 20 minute long scenes of a city being destroyed. It happens in every movie and I think it’s time they simmer down with the throwing of cars.


However.


Along the way, I’ve become a fan of Captain America. (I also enjoy Thor but he makes me feel bad about my hair.) Christopher got me a Captain America shirt and I really like it, but every time I wear it I feel like I’m two steps away from buying tickets to ComicCon. Annabelle had a matching shirt and it made me so happy.

I wore it to the doctor when AB had her one-year appointment and the male nurse looked at it and said, “That’s the best superhero right there.” I replied, “Thank you.” THANK YOU? What kind of answer was that? Did I think I was the creator of Captain America?  



I blame it on my new white hairs and sanity going out the window, but I now have lots of opinions on several superheroes. I gave a lengthy speech of Dad and Christopher about my dislike of Black Widow and how I think she doesn’t deserve to be in a superhero movie. As far as I’m concerned, the only things super about her is she’s super annoying. The new Avengers movie is coming out and I heard a rumor that one of the characters dies. I’m very concerned it might be Captain America or Thor. I’ve barely recovered from Matthew dying in Downton Abbey and I might not be able to handle another death of a fictitious character. 


If someone creates Frog Slayer, you can bet your bottom dollar I’ll be his biggest fan.